Thursday, May 30, 2013

The snubbers are out...hide your heart :(

Watch out! It’s prime snubbing season out there.  I’ve been snubbed so many times in the last month that I have become numb to the affronts. My therapist has diagnosed me with PSSD (Post-Snub Stress Disorder) and thus put me onto an extensive regimen of proactive self-affirmations.  Combining these affirmations with dietary supplements involving consuming vast amount of fermented grain and barley products, I am beginning to accept that I, alone, cannot change snubbing. 

With the loving, nonjudgmental support of my therapist, I have learned to cope with snubbing by following a strict protocol that commences as soon as the snub occurs... Each time I am snubbed, I have been trained to calmly dismount from my bike, hold back my tears, and to shout out in a definitive fashion ten daily affirmations.  Note: Since I cannot control the snubber, (only the snubber can control the snubbing), I can only control my response to the snub (I am in control). In any event, calling out to the snubber is largely a metaphor for my empowerment.

So after being snubbed, I jump off the bike and with dramatic feeling, hands clinched skyward, I call out ten healing affirmations as follows—1. I love myself and I will not weep; 2.  I believe in myself and I will not weep; 3. I am capable of riding my bike; 4. I may not be fast, but I am the star here, it’s about time I shine, your snub can’t hurt me; 5. It’s my life, your snub does not hurt me; 6. I feel great, your snub cannot change that; 7. Today is an awesome day, your snub does not change this fact; 8. It’s my show time, not yours; 9. Your snub has not caused me to panic, everything will be okay; 10. Hey snubber you did not win, I won. 

So far the ten affirmations have seemed to help and I am beginning to internalize the notion that when snubbed it is not a personal affront to my physical and/or mental being.  I am actually starting to feel empathy for the snubber. 

Also as a pseudo-student of sociological phenomena I am making an effort to essentially compartmentalize my experiences as a victim of snubbery.  In order words I am trying to separate the personal pain and suffering that I feel when snubbed from the lofty goal of understanding the snubber.  The idea being that if I can come to understand the motivations or psyche of the snubber, I ,one day, may be able to perhaps work with the snubber to end his or her destructives behaviors. 

So far, the professional me has been able to discern three basic factors that play into complexity of the mind-set of the typical snubber.  Factor one is the gear.  You are much more likely to snubbed by a roadie wearing a neon-green cycling jacket on top of one of the hundreds of absurdly priced carbon road-machine models marketed by Trek or Specialized. When was the last time you got snubbed by a guy on a Surly Cross Check? Factor two:  Snubbers almost always have some fancy pants gizmo stuck in their ears.  Presumably they are listening to some kind of aggressive music.  They are disconnected from the sounds of the street.  To them another cyclist is just another distraction. So sad….Factor three: Snubbers have somehow convinced themselves that they are better off cycling, but they don’t really love the whole cycling experience.   They are out there because they think they are cool…but we know different!!!!