Thursday, August 23, 2012
Minnesota 24 Hour Race...Words of wisdom
Minnesota 24…Here we come!
Buffington and I are in intense preparation for the inaugural Minnesota 24 (http://www.24minnesota.com/). Look for Buffington to impress in the single speed category. Look for me to fall over frequently in the new Fatbike category.
What follows is a definitive list of carefully composed random thoughts on the logic of attempting to race ones bike for twenty-four hours around a smallish loop in the woods adjacent to a reform school for juvenile delinquents.
The two best parts about racing a 24 hour event is that one is afforded the excuse to not train at all for the week leading up to the race (arrive with fresh legs) and to also, in the week leading up to the start, zestfully imbibe his or hers’ favorite fermented barley and hops beverages with reckless abandon. The former is intuitive and thus requires no further explanation. The ladder is based on two important considerations that every 24-hour competitor must confront—1.) The benefits of Beer-Loading now enjoys the status of being acknowledged as well established scientific fact. Unlike that of the unfounded claims by liberals that humans cause problems related to the environment and climate or that Hedge Fund Mangers act in self-interest or that smoking or coal mining causes health problems. According to a Dr. Mannie (PhD in Beerology from Oral Roberts University), who appears regularly on Fox News (that stalwart tower of non-biased journalism) there are a number of natural antioxidants and vitamins in beer that can help prevent heart disease and even rebuild muscle. It also has one of the highest energy contents of any food or drink. Dark beers (Bell’s Kalamazoo Stout) tend to have the most antioxidants, which help reverse cellular damage that occurs naturally in the body. A recent study published in the Journal of American Beers Drinkers Who Believe in the American Way has also found that dark beer has higher iron content compared to lighter beers. Remember, iron-ore from the Iron Range is an essential mineral that our bodies need. Iron-ore is a part of all cells and does many jobs including carrying oxygen from our lungs throughout the rest of our bodies. Note: Iron ore and other valuable stuff that is dug up in huge mega-pits right here in the Northland by dedicated workers hired temporarily by the nice "job creating" corporate people from Canada, Chile, India, and China. 2.) I forgot what the second reason was. I am little foggy from my pre-race preparation…