Friday, December 3, 2010

WikiLeaks provides a rare glimpse into the inner workings of winter endurance cyclists:

Brand new “leak” from WikiLeaks (The names have been changed to protect the innocent...)

Dear C.
I hope life is treating you well, and your hours on the bike have been many. I look forward to seeing you in Tuscobia in a couple of weeks. My training has been slacking. Currently I am down with strep throat. I am looking forward to a couple of days where all I have to do is ride my bike.
My Dad (D) is coming to Tuscobia with me. He is looking forward to seeing you again. I am going to get a room at the same place you are staying (I talked to __).
See you soon.
-X.

Dearest X:
My training has not gone well either. I drink a lot w/gusto and I grow fat, bloated, and unsure of myself. My bulk hinders my positioning on the bicycle and thus presents an unwieldy massiveness that is both disconcerting and embarrassing for those of whom once loved and supported me. I am alone now, living in a van near a drainage septic system. Regarding Tuscobia, I plan to bring my trusty revolver and end my time here on earth if I begin to falter on the trail. You are welcome to use my pistol should you too begin to commits acts of dishonor...On a happier note, I am very much looking forward to seeing you and your dad!!! The Edge-O-town is a classic....Look for B to impress.... Onward to Tuscobia...Onward in the face of impossible odds...Onward Onward into the hell that awaits us!!!!
See ya soon,
Hugs,
-C

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